Friday, June 6, 2008

They Taught Me How To Love More

I was assigned to the college seminary as auxiliary formator for the Summer Program 2008 of the incoming freshmen and sophomores. I was not ready then because i was just asked to relieve the position of two of our brothers who fortunately had their 30-day retreat in Cebu. I do not know what to give them during the conference and i have the fear of not being able to become a good Big Brother to them. I was joined by one Vietnamese and by our Vocation Director who stood as our head formator.

It was a challenge to be assigned to the Sophomores as their formator-in-charge since they are expected to be good leaders and good kuyas to the new comers. Two days after i learned that i would be staying there in the college, i already thought of teaching them how to love their younger brothers and to be witnesses to the ideal Claretian Seminarian. My conferences revolved on God's way of Loving, of Christ's way of loving, of Claret's way of loving, and how is one Claretian expected to love. I don't know if the message got across the bridge.

One humbling experience is that of Thursday, a week before the last days of the summer program. I mistakenly overlooked the time and i came angry telling my sophomores to stop their practice for their Humanities class and start their Manualia. I miscalculated the time plus because i dismissed the Freshmen earlier than the time they have to finish their PSA and the weather is changed already and about to rain. And so it happened... the funniest experience i ever had. Sayang ng drama...hehehe. one courageous sophomore texted me..."its not yet time kuya..." I know i have hurt them all. I know i failed in the principles i wanted to impart to them. I know i made a mistake and i'd been not objective in my action. So in the evening i called them all for a short meting. I asked for forgiveness and said sorry to each of them.

It was a humbling experience and at the same time for me a practicum of what i wanted to teach in the Conferences - that leadership and living in this kind of life is not just a life of glory and fame, but also a life of humility and acceptance of my own and other's weaknesses. Loving is not just about caring and giving. It is also about giving-up ones pride and asking. This i think completed my talks. I know it didn't came to them as like that but at least I did it myself. These boys taught me how to love. They taught me how to accept individual attitudes and dynamics as i dialogue with them individually. They taught me how to be objective and subjective at the same time. They taught me how to be open in the formation that i got from my previous rectors/formators. They made me understand the importance of formation, the role of a formator, the role of the Holy Spirit in the formation process. And the most important of all they they were the one's who actually taught me to love them personally because God's presence, God's image is in each of them.

Thank you very much bros. I treasure you a lot. Thanks for being part of my life and for forming me. Thank you Bosing for the chance of being with them and for teaching me through them. God bless them all and those who are in many ways involved in formation ministry.